During a recent Date Your Mate Challenge I asked the participating couples, “What is the best marriage advice you ever heard?“
I found their answers very inspiring and I hope you do too!
Best marriage advice I ever heard was from a college professor who was a bit surprised to have a married, 19-year-old student in his classroom. He said that whenever some little otherwise innocuous habit about your spouse starts to annoy you–the way they blow their nose, the fact that they always miss the laundry hamper when they try to toss their laundry in, whatever–remember that you can choose to let that habit become a constant annoyance to you, or, you can choose to simply not be annoyed by it, accept the habit as part of who your spouse is, and choose to love them with a love that is not easily offended. Realizing that getting annoyed by what my spouse does or doesn’t do is a CHOICE on my part definitely had a lasting impact on my marriage.
Best marriage advice I ever heard was be the kind of partner you want your partner to be. To be quick to forgive and to be slow to anger. To forgive easily and do not hold a record of wrongs. To find out their love language from Gary Chapman’s 5 love languages and to show them love through the way they receive love.
Best marriage advice I have gotten was from Gma Pat & Pops….pray for your spouse daily. And love is an action word….choose to do it daily.
Best marriage advice I have gotten was on a card we got at our wedding: “Always keep the passion alive in your marriage. Keep the spark lit at all time.” So true!! Oh! And how do we apply it? Some things I’ll keep private but we definitely kiss A LOT
Our best advice was given at my bridal shower almost 25 years ago, if you’re having a fight that can’t be resolved, take off your clothes and fight in the nude. Works every time.
Best marriage advice was “as long as you always respect each other and give love, you will always have a great marriage“. It’s worked for us for almost 11 yrs!
Love is not an emotion, it is a choice.
I loved my mother dearly. I miss her terribly. But she was the only one who gave me advice on my marriage. She said, “remember that marriage is not always wedding bells, there will be tough times also.” And her next bit of advice will make you laugh. If he has his hand on your knee he has only one thing on his mind!
You are husband and wife first- son, daughter, mother, father employee whatever second. Keep your marriage the #1 priority. Don’t let anything including kids or parents come before your spouse.
I remember a story about a young man who met with his beloved’s father to ask for her hand in marriage (those were the days!). The older man asked, “Son, do you like her?” The suitor protested, “Sir, I LOVE her!” “I know you do, son, but I asked if you like her. There is no more desperately miserable life than that of a couple who love, but don’t like one another. If your marriage is going to go all the way, you sure better LIKE her a lot.“
During our premarital counseling, my pastor told us to remember that marriage is not 50/50, it’s 100/100. He also told us, when on the honeymoon, don’t point and laugh 🙂
Don’t go to bed mad. It may make for a tired morning but it is so much better if you work through it while it is still fresh….but you have to be willing to listen to the other person more than you speak.
Marriage is not work, work takes all the fun out of it! Marriage takes constant effort if you want it to last forever, but it’s the kind of effort that is enjoyable and rewarding! Sure, there are hard times in life and moments that aren’t the greatest, but marriage gives you a great partner to endure those moments with and share the burden. Start looking at the harder parts of marriage as an opportunity to strengthen your relationship and make it better!
Marriage advice – From my husband Aaron: Pray for your spouse twice as much as you talk. From me: Never go to bed angry – first it’s biblical and second life is short, we are not guaranteed any time past the moment we’re living! I actually like to say never leave angry, not just at night, but anytime, work it out or at least leave in peace praying about the situation and taking a minute to say I love you to each other even when you’re angry. Don’t let emotions rule situations!
One of my favorite pieces of advice we got when my husband and I got married was “always forgive your spouse at the end of everyday“. I didn’t quite understand what it meant until a few months in to our marriage. What I take from it is everyday there is something that I or Zack does to irritate, annoy, frustrate one another. But at the end of the day you have to let it all go. Start fresh every morning. Also one more piece of advice always touch one another when going to bed.
Harry & Jessica
My dad told me that marriage is about giving your all, even if you feel your spouse is not. He said that marriage is not a give and take, or even 50/50, it’s each person giving their all.
Don’t go to bed angry: If you and your spouse are having an argument, make sure to resolve it before you go to sleep, or if it’s something that can’t be resolved in a day, try and at least make a plan for resolution before you go to sleep. And always, always kiss goodnight and say I love you before you go to sleep.
Don’t make fun of the choices your spouse makes — after all, you’re one of them!
That love is a choice, you have to choose to love your spouse everyday. I remind myself that at times when I don’t particularly love something that my spouse does, I still choose to love him in spite of it.
Two ideas. 1st: Don’t ever argue with your clothes on! LOL! And 2nd: An 85 year old couple once told us to always make sure you give each other a little kiss before you go to bed. Isn’t that sweet. And that’s so easy to do and we also recommend that you do the same upon Rising bent upon coming and going. Also easy and can make a little bit of difference in each other’s day.
Marriage is not a 50/50 contract. It is a covenant with each person giving 100 percent. Love your spouse 100 percent of the time even if they don’t deserve it.
One of the best pieces of marriage advice I have ever heard comes from a business book by Marcus Buckingham called The One Thing You Need to Know. One chapter was about his research of life long married couples and what factor above all else makes them happy. Here is what he found: Find the most generous explanation for each other’s behavior and believe it. Great advice! Maintaining a generous perspective means giving the benefit of the doubt, choosing to believe the best and sometime consciously wearing “rose colored glasses”. I know when Chrissy does this, I tend to rise to her expectations.
Always love your spouse above your children! This has been at times a challenge as I am learning how to do this with having our new toddler and then our next new baby in 4 months.
Best marriage advice: There is no win-lose when arguing in a relationship. There is only win-win or lose-lose. If one loses, you both lose. Keep your grass green by watering it daily, and go for the win-win!!
Don’t go to bed angry, always kiss goodnight, and try to keep screens (electronics) out of the bedroom. That last one I find hard at times, as we both like to read on our phones, or play video games, etc. But they shouldn’t be the first (or last) thing you see getting up or going to sleep 🙂
The Date Your Mate Challenge is a very exciting four week Facebook event to help strengthen your marriage and have fun in the process!
Basically it is the gamification of dating your spouse, kind of like a Tough Mudder for your marriage.
- Four Dates
- Four Weeks
- Weekly Challenges
- Prize Giveaways
- Date Ideas
- New Couple Connections
- And much, more…